i like the polar ice cap idea nick, i've got a guy on it.

a friend called me last night, lots of times, as Mr. Moore can atest for. to? oh well, back to the point. i told him that i would be there for him if he needed to talk, but i'm nervous that he is going to tell me something that i don't want the responsibility of knowing. again torn. between my word and my nervousness.

either today or tuesday will be my last day at "the Dirty Bird". that is uber-awesome. (that's for you jesse!) but i don't think that i would have had the metaphoric balls to do this without everyone who is here today, you all made it possible, and should pat yourselves on the back. but not while eating, you might cause yourself to choke. in all seriousness though, i think that previously, when i wanted to leave it wasn't the work or anything that kept me there. it was the insecurity of having a real group of friends outside of the fake ones at work. a lot of my "friends" at work will never call me, and i sure as hell wont call them. it will be left to the awkward hello's when i go in to visit the real friends, who i will actually talk to next week, month, etc.

to make a long story less long than it is shaping up to be, thanks guys. you've helped me care less about things that i don't need to. and you've helped me see that, in reference to a lot of things, i am just too goddam nice. i'm glad that none of you have really seen the bitch that red robin brings out in me, you don't deserve it. except maybe joey.

topo.